This spring, when we learned that we were expecting another baby, there was great joy and excitement at our house. We were thankful for answered prayers and our outlook was rosy and positive.
Then I visited a doctor who cast fears into my life. Oh, she didn’t mean to. She was just covering herself legally, I suppose, but her words and attitudes weren’t at all what I had expected when I innocently sat awaiting her entrance. Her first concern was my age. I’m over 35 where apparently your risks go up for having a baby. I know several people who have had healthy babies after 40 so while this news dampened me a little, I wasn’t going to let it worry me. After all, as my husband points out, I’m 36—really ancient. Her next concern was that I had had a previous Caesarean. Actually, my first son was Caesarean and I had two natural or VBAC births after. The last pregnancy had no complications and everything went rather speedily. She quoted studies but couldn’t give me her recommendation. It appeared to me that she wanted me to have another Caesarean. I balked. Recovery is longer for one.
True to my nature, I researched the subject and found that VBAC births are safer and that my risks weren’t as bad or as life threatening as I had been imagining from the conversation with the doctor.
Once again, I was feeling joyful. Morning sickness—all day sickness really—was over and I was feeling fine. I was a little tired and I drank a lot of water but I was assured this was normal. I’d had a test that said I wasn’t diabetic so I was thinking that this pregnancy was going to be “smooth sailing” like Isaac’s.
Then at 28 weeks, I started a series of tests and weekly (some biweekly) visits to the clinic and the dreaded gestational diabetes monster raised its ugly head and once again, I lost my joy and let myself succumb to my fears and worries.
I read an article by Dr. Charles Stanley, a Baptist minister, who said, “Fear is a joy killer. Satan tempts us to doubt God and fear Him. We should have a reverent fear of the Lord. However, we also should remember with deep love and affection that He loves us and wants our fellowship. He provides the courage you need to establish goals and to reach each one . . . whatever your need is, God is the answer.”
Joy is a choice. We don’t have to let our negative thoughts bring us down. We can push them aside and choose to find the positive. For example, I don’t like taking my blood four or five times a day to check my sugar but it isn’t that bad. I have a new doctor and he is very supportive and encouraging. He doesn’t think I’m old and he believes I can have this baby without surgery. He has three sons too so he understands what my home life is like as well.
In Psalm 56:3-4, David says, “When I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I will not be afraid.”
I can cry my sadness and disappointments. I have emotions, after all. God understands. I just don’t have to get stuck there. I can reach out to God for strength. I can remember that He gives me hope, not despair. I can remember that He is in control. I can trust Him and know that He knows the outcome and that He will be with me through it all, that He wants good things for me. I can remember that it pleases Him to give us the desires of our hearts because we love Him. He knows the desires of my heart. He is looking out for my welfare and the baby’s. Everything will be just fine.
I don’t have to listen to negative people. I can be thankful for those who have offered their help during my time of need and know that I am truly blessed.
I have to focus on the positive promises and not dwell on could be, might be statements. Having a baby is a blessing, a joyous occasion, something to shout from the rooftops about. Babies are love and promises for the future. Thank you, God!
Whatever your circumstance, don’t let anyone steal your joy! Hang on to it with both hands and when you need loving reminders, you can turn to God, your family and your friends. When you’re feeling overwhelmed and all alone, you’ve probably lost your joy. Grope around if you have to so that you can find it again.
As Dr. Stanley says, “True joy is not dependent on our circumstances. It is dependent on our Lord and Savior. He never changes, and His love for us will never end.”
We just have to remember this and not let anything steal our joy.
Have a great week.